Responding to Emotionally Distressing Situations with our Youth
Photo Credit: Nicole Buchenholz
ALERT SBC STAFF IMMEDIATELY IF YOU SUSPECT ANY ISSUES IN YOUR STUDENT’S LIFE. IF IT IS A CRISIS SITUATION, CALL 911.
We’ve heard many cases where children share their innermost thoughts with their buddies. This is natural because many of our buddy pairs have met weekly for years. However, when a child shares their dark inner thoughts with you, it’s often hard to know how to react.
We’ve also seen cases where volunteers ask their students about missing homework or an unusual rate of absence, only to discover that their students are emotionally struggling. Similarly, it is often hard to determine how to respond to a child who is not attending school. Perhaps they are scared of feeling unworthy and consequently being bullied.
This article serves as a guide to help navigate situations such as these. We at SBC don’t expect you to act as therapists, so please flag us whenever you hear/see something concerning!
What do I do if I suspect a crisis?
We can experience two categories of situations where ALGEE can be put to practical use. This situation can either be a crisis or a non-crisis.
A crisis is a time of intense difficulty, trouble, danger, or distress. A crisis may be mental, emotional, or physical.
Situations that are considered an immediate crisis: medical emergency, non-suicidal self-injury, suicidal thoughts and behaviors, severe psychotic states, severe effects of alcohol or drug use (substance use crisis).
Situations that have the potential to become a crisis: Panic attacks, aggressive behaviors, substance misuse following a traumatic event
What is the ALGEE plan?
Approach and Assess: If you notice changes in your buddy’s behavior, please ask them if everything is okay. Share that you are concerned and want to hear more about any issues.
Listening non-judgmentally: Please listen to what your student is saying and validate their feelings (“wow, that must be so hard”) without expressing any dismay (“I don’t think you should be doing that!”)
Giving reassurance: Please give reassurance that there are resources and people at ABC to help.
Encouraging professional support & self-care: Depending on the nature of the situation, it may be beneficial to refer the child for professional help. SBC staff can handle this conversation!
The ALGEE plan is non-linear, meaning that all five steps do not have to be carried out in the same order every time. It is optional to complete all five.
If your student raises an issue, please be prepared to listen non-judgmentally during the session. Alert us after the session and we can discuss further.
How do we assess a situation?
When you talk to your students, please avoid pressuring them to speak immediately. Young people often want to downplay what they are going through, partially to avoid upsetting you.
Share that you are concerned. “I have noticed that you have been participating less frequently…” I’m worried about you…,“ without using language that can come off as accusatory (“you always…”)
If you hear something concerning, share with the youth that it is your professional obligation to report the situation to us. The child should not feel blindsided when other team members approach them. Although confidentiality is paramount, the student’s safety comes first.
How do we listen non-judgmentally?
When you listen non-judgmentally, you are helping your children feel heard and understood. You can set the tone for other conversations they will have later in life.
When you are listening, please use affirmative body language, maintain eye contact, and use verbal cues such as “Mhm”. It is important not to interrupt the student.
We at SBC are not mental health professionals, and we are unable to diagnose a child. If you suspect a situation may be at a crisis-level, please text “WELL” to 65173/call 1-888-NYC-WELL immediately so you are not handling it alone.
Resources
National suicide prevention hotline - Text “WELL” to 65173 or call 1-888-NYC-WELL
If an emergency or in immediate danger, instead dial 911.